I would like to wake up next to a "real man", who honestly cares about me

Discover the structure behind dating, when things “suddenly” work. Learn to see the big picture and where to start. Download 3-step guide CREATIVE DATING LOOP for free. BONUS inside: online tool - "Dating Readiness Quiz" to explore your specific situation and an Online course to explain your relationship patterns and help you build an action plan.

Private coaching

Sometimes you might have an issue that is beyond the scope of the group training that needs to be addressed before you can successfully move forward. In that case you may benefit from private coaching, where I guide you through mental exercises, that help in overcoming the obstacles such as lack of self worth, grieving over a loss or blockages related to traumatic experience. Coaching can be used as a separate service or as an addition to the group training.

Five reasons why combining training & coaching brings the best results

  • The advantage of following the training first is that many of your concerns will get addressed through the training, which is cost and time effective for you.
  • During the training, you will become more aware of unconscious patterns, that you can then discuss privately.
  • In coaching is a full attention on you and your situation.
  • In the free introductory coaching session we review your results from the dating audit together (online tool), lay out your goals, you can ask questions and we both decide whether we would like to cooperate further. 
  • Alternatively, if you know your specific problem, for example you want to overcome a recent break up or a traumatic experience, we will use the introductory session to go over your expectations and outline a direction that could work for you. 
  • Afterwards the coaching session lasts around 1-2 hours, depending on the topic you want to work on. We can meet in my office in Duffel or work via Skype. 
  • Price is 75 EUR / hour including BTW. 
  • Usually we work in coaching cycles (6 sessions) over which we focus on your chosen topic. Six session is short enough to stay focused and long enough to already see results. 

What do people say about the private coaching:

I decided to explore "What is stopping me from doing what I want in my life." I got very fast result of unblocking myself. Within five sessions I got rid of limiting thoughts that caused me suffering.

For example; for years I had problems to speak in public or even in front of a group. I always felt some shame while thinking I am not good enough, I have nothing important to say, and other negative thoughts. After one session, where we worked around this shame feeling, I realized that suddenly I had no problem at all to speak in a group. I felt proud and exited to share who I am and what I want to set in the world with my business. Now it is so easy to spread my view, my words, my purpose. And it feels great!!!

Update one year later: Tine has her own business empowering women, she does regular public webinars, private coaching and she also met the man of her dreams. 

Tine Antwerpen

Note: A variety of problems related to SHAME are explained in this article: FIVE SHADES OF HIDDEN SHAME THAT SABOTAGES YOUR RELATIONSHIPS. 

I had a fear of leaving my comfort zone. After participating in the workshops I become more assertive, so I decided to go for the coaching as well. As a result I am now more convinced I am worthy and enough. The best part of the experience was going back to my earliest memories and being able to interpret them differently. I now understand my parents and I made peace with their actions.

Update after 6 evening workshops and 2 coaching sessions: When I look back at the beginning of the year, I see myself as somebody who was still quite unhappy. Someone who had major issues with her family; someone who felt insecure around other people.
I notice that I have changed. I tell people what I want. I put boundaries in place when necessary. I no longer act emotionally if people don't accept me. My friends say I am more assertive. I feel like I can soon start thinking about dating. 

Christel Berchem

I started with the topic "What I want in a romantic relationship". As a result after five sessions:   1. I know what kind of man and relationship I want

                             2. I have more clarity about what I want in general from life

                         3. I am starting to define more my identity and learning to protect it 

Setting boundaries helps me protect my energy better and I can use it for my goals. After years I felt inspired to create my web site and I feel proud of it. I realized I deserve to enjoy the money I earn and planned a trip I can look forward to. I started taking better care of my looks. It feels good and people notice it immediately. I feel I am becoming more authentic.

Karin Fox Germany

I've never had life coaching before, so was unsure of what it could bring me. I explored a change in career path. I got a clear idea of what I like, what would make me happy, bring me satisfaction and how I can go about taking steps to achieve it. I felt listened to, cared for and supported.

Louise Heverlee

I'm looking for insights and palpable results and NLP feels like the right tool for me. Other methods I have tried like meditation and a short session of gestalt therapy, made me feel better but did not resonate with me as much as Michaela's sessions do. In the private coaching I decided to explore the feelings of inadequacy. As a result I understand where and how those feelings developed and I can start changing them. 

Alex Brussels

Do you wonder: "Are you able and qualified to help me? Are you a therapist?"

I am a certified NLP Master practitioner since 2015. I received my education at the NLP University in California, one of the world's leading NLP institutions, founded by Robert Dilts. Master practitioner's level means 400 hours of academic study and practical experience of guiding people through the NLP exercises. My study was with focus on personal development. 

Between 2015 and 2018 I organized approximately 50 NLP workshops, where I shared the NLP models with people and guided them through the exercises. I continue my education by reading NLP books, following relevant publications and putting what I learn, into practice. In 2018 I started working with NLP full time. I developed my own application of NLP - model "Creative Dating Loop". I also extended my services to offer private NLP coaching. While I don't call myself a therapist, thanks to NLP, I was able to assist people in topics like: 

- Resolving inner conflicts and being able to move forward with life
  • A 34 year old man from Brussels was able to finally start a relationship after he let go of the fear of being controlled and losing his freedom. 
  • A 40 year old woman from Mol moved to Switzerland, to follow her dream, after overcoming guilt and confusion.
  • A 35 year old woman from Brussels realized that her attraction to "players" was caused by conflicting interests between freedom and relationship. She is now happy in a committed relationship. Update 18 months later - the proud parents just anouced the birth of their first son. 
- Overcoming doubts about possibility to have a relationship
  • A 28 year old woman from Leuven, who never had a relationship before was able to let go of her past and finally meet a partner, they are now 1.5 years together, planning their future. 
- Transforming limiting beliefs about sex
  • A 50 year old woman had a block against having sex, as it was something "wrong and shameful", now she feels in control of making her choices.
- Relief from anxiety after an expat moved to Belgium and felt very alone
  • A 31 year old man was able to start seeing the light at the end of tunnel in comparison with 2 depressing months alone in Antwerpen. It helped him with faster integration and feeling of belonging. 
- Transforming limiting beliefs about self worth, related to early childhood trauma
  • A 51 year old woman from Antwerpen was able to see her early childhood in a different perspective. As a result she has more compassion for her parents and changed the conclusions about that experience - it wasn't really about her, so her identity doesn't have to hold this burden. 
  • A 30 year old woman from Germany had a similar experience as above. Before the exercise, spending a few days with her mother was  guaranteed fight. After the exercise she was able to remain calm and compassionate, and only had some smaller exchange of opinion, despite spending 3 weeks together in one apartment. 
- Transforming self judgement, self doubt and codependency on unsuitable relationships, related to shame
  • A 48 year old woman from Antwerpen discovered that many of her limiting beliefs were (unreasonable) standards of other people imposed on her in childhood and that feelings of shame was keeping her stuck in self sabotaging behavior. After transforming the shame, she was able to set up her own standards. As a consequence a lot of anger and sadness was released from her body, allowing her to process these stuck emotions. She is now more aware of her own boundaries and not blindly pulled into unsuitable relationships. 
- Transforming the feeling of being a victim through conflict resolution and forgivness process
  • A 64 year old woman felt like a less worthy person and a victim next to another women who "stole" her boyfriend ten years ago. After the exercise she was able to see the other woman as a human with flaws, acting out of her weakness. This helped the 64 year old to no longer see herself as a victim but rather the more ethical person.
  • A 45 year old man from Herent was able to discover his part of the responsibilty in the arguments with his ex-wife, which made him less angry at her, when he also understood her perspective. 
  • A 32 year man from Mol was able to see the bigger picture in an argument with his colleague, who was getting on his nerves. He realized they are trying to achieve the same goal, but with their completely different talents and point of views. They agreed with the manager to split their roles in this goal, so that they could both use their core talents.
- Reconnecting with lost love through grieving process
  • This exercise helped me personally overcome many years long grief of a loss of my unborn child and the fear that it would never work again. I was able to finally meet the child in a virtual way. Before, I thought of it as the "poor little dead baby", but through this experience, I felt like the spirit of the child was ok and simly had other things to do. This was very emotional, but afterwards I felt a huge relief. The next month after the exercise, I became pregnant, despite being already 37.
  • Same exercise on another occasion helped me keep the good memories related to my ex-husband close to my heart, without feeling sad about the divorce. We reached a point, where we are mutually at peace with each other. This contributed to having a clean start of my new relationship, without bringing old problems into it. 
  • A 48 your old woman from Antwerpen was grieving the loss of a dream - she never had children despite her desire to have them. She found a relief and unexpectingly reconnected with an inner part of herself, that feels beautiful, free to express self and happy to live in joy. 
- Letting go of anger and setting up personal boundaries
  • A 39 year old man from Brussels was always behaving like a "good boy", due to limiting beliefs (in order to keep love of important people). He felt trapped, helpless and frustrated, but never expressed his anger. Learning how to express anger in a safe place, helped him release some of the build up anger from many years, which reduced the feeling of helplessness. On the contrary, he felt more resolute and strong, by naming and expressing his emotions. 


The coaching requires your commitment and energy in order to make a progress. 

The exercises that have the fastest result and biggest impact on improving your life, are usually on the level of your identity. This also means, that you can have potentially a strong physical / mental reaction in the days after the exercise. For example having a temporary headache, back pain, stomach pain or intense anger or a need to cry out the grief, collected over time. This is not bad, it is part of the mental detox and a confirmation something major has shifted. Finally the stuck emotions can be released and stop causing you problems. Healthy and stable people can process this and feel a lot of relief and sense of progress afterwards. 

However, for people who are unstable mentally or practically, this might be too much to handle and they might feel to overwhelmed by the process. They might not have the energy or commitment that is required to go through. 

In case you suffer from depression, psychosis, if you have recent suicidal thoughts or if your overall life is unstable or stuck in multiple aspects (such as having no job, lack of friends, major health problems, lack of reason to live, ...), then the coaching is not suitable for you. Instead, working with a psychotherapist would be a better choice. 

How does our cooperation work

  1. Start by downloading my FREE guide - CREATIVE DATING LOOP ©. You will benefit from having the big picture and a clear direction towards successful dating.

  2. Take advantage of the online tool, where you can test your specific situation. This "dating audit" has a value of 290 EUR but you can get it now for free as part of the guide. Get your access inside the guide. 

  3. Alternatively, if you know your specific problem, for example you want to overcome a recent break up or a traumatic experience, contact me directly to set up a free introductory session (60 min).
  1. In the free intoductory session, we go over your results from the dating audit or discuss your specific problem and set a roadmap towards your goal.
  1. Based on the intro session, you decide, whether this is for you and you want to continue with private coaching. 
  1. People usually experience a shift in how they perceive their situation and how they feel about it, already after one session. That doesn't mean everything is solved in one session, but there is a sense of progress. 
  2. In addition to coaching, you might want to participate in group training, which can help you progress even faster. 

You ask, I answer

In case you would like to know more, you can check out the Q&A section.

If you don’t find there what you are looking for you can always contact me at info@michaelaray.com.

Alternatively just fill in the contact form below and I will be in touch to organise a time convenient for us both to have a 15 min chat. I look forward to discovering how I can help you on your journey.



I was avoiding to think about dating because I was afraid it would make me long for it even more. The workshop helped me get reassurance and insight into what I want and confidence that I can get it. I particularly liked the combination of the exercises with an 'unconscious' integration - that makes it very powerful.

Update after 6 months: I am 2,5 months in a relationship that I enjoy very much. I am especcialy happy that we are both able to understand each other and communicate in a mature way. 

Olivia Brussels, for ref. +32 484 662 084

It took me a while to move to the “real dating“ since I first had to get into my zone. Now, 6 months later, I am able to choose between many men. Thanks to the book "Mindful Diva Dating" and extra training support, I am on track. Even better news, meanwhile Mr. Right appeared!

I am very glad Michaela taught me her system how to undertake dating with joy and laughter. One of the best decisions I made in a long time!

Denise, 60 Antwerpen

I would like to wake up next to a "real man", who honestly cares about me

Discover the structure behind dating, when things “suddenly” work. Learn to see the big picture and where to start. Download 3-step guide CREATIVE DATING LOOP for free.

I would like to wake up next to a "real man", who honestly cares about me

Discover the structure behind dating, when things “suddenly” work. Learn to see the big picture and where to start. Download 3-step guide CREATIVE DATING LOOP for free. 

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